A mother might give birth to a child but before that a child gives birth to a mother!

 

Whats App Group called Shaky Shaky (I am not sure where that name came from, but these guys are our besties and I can’t wait for Neev to grow up with their kiddos!!)

These friends talking and planning to meet -They are totally clueless to what has transpired in the last few hours.

 A Friend: how about you guys (addressed toward me and my hub). Riya darling can you make it? How far along are you Or Should I ask how close are you from delivering…lol

Me: We are minus 1 day from delivering …lol

Another Friend: What????

What????

Is the baby already here??

I love these guys!

 

Similar were the reactions when our families learned about me going from no sign of labor few hours ago to announcing our baby in the matter of few hours. I went from nothing to 9.5 centimeter dilated in under 2 hours at little over 36 weeks. That is a story, or should I say post for another day though.

Having a baby reminds me in some ways of getting married. You are excited yet nervous at the same time. You have this due date ingrained in your mind. You start planning your whole life around it. Family, friends, colleagues, your OB all have your due date circled in their calendars. Everyone is anticipating this big event that you’ve been preparing for 9 months.

Unlike a wedding, however, which one can prepare for to happens right on schedule, babies don’t typically arrive on a scheduled due date! Mine sure was in a rush to come out.

Deciding to have a kid

We had already “kicked this can down the road in our mid 20s aka had the baby conversation. Everyone should, Ideally before they get married.  We both knew we wanted kids someday but not till we were in our 30s and had traveled quite a bit. We had a nice life, with plenty of free time and financial freedom that allowed for us to do that.

As my 30th birthday rolled around I still wasn’t feeling the pull the same way my friends were describing it. May be because everyone around us was having kids in their low to mid 30s so waiting a little more felt very natural to us.

Why are all these people in your family suddenly interested in our sex life, I remember asking my husband after returning from a family dinner. He could not help but laugh.

Looking back now, I am glad we did not fall for any pressure and decided to have a kid when we felt mentally and emotionally ready for it. If there is one thing you walk away with is – WAIT TILL YOU BOTH FEEL READY.

Finding out

I would be lying if I said I was extremely thrilled or emotional to see that pink line on the pregnancy test. My first thought was, is this it? So that’s how one finds out. Why don’t I feel overjoyed or emotional the way women say they felt on finding out? I just felt dumbfounded….excited but anxious. Too many thoughts racing through my mind…..gosh I was just on a roller coaster in Disneyland last week (On a trip with my family unaware of the pregnancy) …I really shouldn’t have planned that trip and what will I do about the upcoming Austin trip we have planned with our friends ….I surely can’t be drinking anymore…what was I going to tell them? Not drinking would be a first give away….I don’t want to lie to these guys…

This tiny $10 test just told me that I had a baby growing inside of ME? Is that really it?

I woke up my sleeping hunk of a husband from his beauty sleep and his reaction was pretty much similar to mine. He asked if I was sure and if I tested properly.  We retested and his reaction was just a lame “Ok…I guess”. We still laugh about it to date.

I don’t think it sinked in for either one of us till our very first ultrasound. It all happened way too fast, or should I say sooner than people said it can take once you are over 30. We were pregnant before we could wrap our mind around the decision. I think it all started sinking in and feeling real after the formal confirmation and first couple appointments.

Pregnancy

My pregnancy started a little rough as I had severe nausea for the first 5 months and had lot of food aversions but was uneventful otherwise. Friends and family were thrilled and celebrated throughout the pregnancy. My side of the family was going to be welcoming a very first baby not only in the immediate family but extended family as well!! Everyone was over joyed and looking forward to their new titles. Celebrations continued throughout. Darling husband threw me a beautiful baby shower and had everything planned to the T.

I decided to take the last month of my pregnancy off to relish on some home cooked meals by my mom and spend some quality time with my darling husband. Afterall, it had just been the two of us for the past decade and that was suddenly going to be changing

 

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BUT guess what?? Baby had some other plans he made an appearance the day I started my Maternity break…yup ….the very same day.

 

Birth of a Mother

“The moment I heard that heartbeat, the mother was born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never.

It’s impossible for any of us to know what kind of parent we’ll be until we become one. Nothing—and I mean absolutely nothing—can prepare you for having your own baby, one you can’t wave goodbye to at the end of the day.

That 8 week ultrasound appointment changed my world upside down. Now there was a third wheel in the mix. That heartbeat on the monitor brought many tears and definitely some fears along…lot of what ifs….

As the pregnancy progressed, my arms ached to hold him. Seeing a healthy little baby swim around sparked a light of life-changing emotions in me.

I thought I knew love. I love my husband very much. We’ve been together for a decade now. I know love. I know what it feels like in the depths of my soul.

But I was so wrong.

Nothing prepares you for that soul-crushing love that you feel for your kid. It’s not that I love my kid more, it’s just so much more intense. It’s possibly because I feel a fierce need to protect him or maybe because I grew him inside of me and witnessed his every movement. Could it be his fresh, slightly sweet and immensely satisfying scent that did me in? At all hours of the day, I take long, greedy sniffs as I cradle him in my arms. I’ve already forgotten the sleep I lost, but I don’t think I will ever forget this smell.

With my son approaching 6 months of age, his new baby smell has long since faded. But I still love his scent, as fresh and satisfying – and addictive — as ever.

 

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4 thoughts on “Child Gives Birth To A Mother – Motherhood Series

  1. Beautiful.. loved reading, as always.. Can’t believe Neev will be turning 6 months soon 🙂

    1. Thank you darling! Yes, he will indeed be 6 month this Thanksgiving! Time Flies so fast! I am trying to hold on to all these precious moments with him…Why do these kids grow up so fast? agh..

  2. What a beautiful post♥️♥️ Tugged at my heart. Reminded me of how beautiful you looked pregnant.

    1. Thank you beautiful! I absolutely loved meeting you too and talking everything motherhood! We should absolutely meet up after the holidays. Will plan something in January after all these family commitments die down. I REALLY want to see the girls!

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